I have a *friend* (I’ll call him Bernard) who is invited to a wedding this Saturday. The wedding is for a pretty good friend of Bernard’s. The wedding will be in Napa. Bernard lives in Hawaii.
Bernard received a Save the Date card for the wedding months and months ago and then received the actual invitation a little over a month ago. To my absolute shame, I recently learned my friend Bernard never sent the RSVP card in! I lectured him and stressed how important these cards are. To make up for his error, he called the groom and expressed his apologies, then said he would attend the wedding.
Bernard is now in a bit of a pickle. He has a lovely girlfriend here in Hawaii and she was invited to the wedding as well but she can’t attend due to prior commitments. However, just about all of his buddies that will be attending the wedding are bringing dates and therefore have couple-y arragements for hotels and travel. Bernard is not really interested in renting a car or getting his own hotel room for the wedding. I mean, way to feel left out, right? For some reason that I cannot understand, Bernard has put off getting in touch with other single guys invited to the wedding and even worse…. HE HAS NOT BOUGHT HIS PLANE TICKET. The wedding is this Saturday, on the other side of the ocean.
Wouldn’t you just be pissed if you had invited Bernard to your wedding? Argh!
And how would you feel if you were currently planning your wedding to marry Bernard? Double argh, let me tell you! Because *Bernard* is my betrothed.
My dear fiance does not have enough responsibility to send in the RSVP and doesn’t have the commitment to buy a damn plane ticket! I am in shock. I have pestered, nagged, yelled and even pouted. Finally today I resolved to make it none of my business. If he pays $1,000 for a ticket to his friend’s wedding, so be it. If he doesn’t it make it to the wedding, that’s his problem.
And while I no longer accept any responsibility for his actions with regard to this wedding, I am beyond terrified by what his behavior represents. When we own a home together will he wait to fix the leaking roof until the day before the storm rolls in? When we have kids together will he take the energy to feed them healthy food? Will his friends buy their plane tickets two days before our wedding? Will they not return their RSVP cards and leave us hanging? Oh dear, what sort of life am I signing up for?!
On a happy note, I am pleased to report that my fiance’s name is not Bernard. No offense to the Bernard-loving ladies out there.
Has anyone else ever had to deal with a very bad fiance or similarly bad wedding guests?